“The tricky thing about privilege, and more specifically toxic masculinity, is that you typically don’t become aware of it until someone calls it out – and speaking from experience, this can be particularly explosive, seeing as though irrationality and a lack of introspection are prime characteristics of toxic masculinity.”
I fucking ADORE Jessamyn Stanley.
A total goddess.
“Here’s the deal, I’m gonna give it to ya straight, because I know that’s what you appreciate. You’ve got to stop triggering people with eating disorders in an attempt to improve ratings. For the love of God, I lost count of how many times you showed those precious girls raising their shirts to show your camera crew how emaciated they are, their protruding collar bones, and rib cage. They wore the least amount of clothes allowable on network TV to highlight their fragile physical state. It was troubling the number of times they’re shown bingeing and purging in the bathroom. And then, to make matters worse, you allow their parents to discuss the girls’ dramatic weight loss in NUMBERS, including their weight prior to the onset of the eating disorder and current weight.”
Do you have social menopause?
I can say with certainty that I’m well and truly past social menopause and am now cocooned up in my bubble of early bed times and back pain.
How to spot a MLM/pyramid scheme from a mile away.
Don’t get suckered in, folks!
Side story time: A few years back, I was approached by an ex colleague to meet for a business opportunity. He works with an agency so I presumed it was a speaking gig, but it turned out to be an MLM spiel for AmWay about how I could retire early. He asked me for a second meeting and to bring my husband so he could explain it to him, and I was so bewildered by wtf was happening, so I agreed. Next meeting, hubby and I showed up and my ex colleague had also brought his wife and baby to further “sell” the lifestyle to us. They invited us to a conference they were going to that night and, wanting to see what levels of brainwash-ery were involved, we went along. And ooooh boy, was it brainwash-y. The best part of the night was when the conference host (a Scottish man in an ill-fitting suit who claimed he had no more than a high school education, despite the massive superiority complex on him) referred to women as “mental midgets who shouldn’t make decisions.” The women in the room nodded, and held their husbands’ hands.
People will perceive you however you please, and you have to make peace with that.
Don’t give too much importance to the opinions of people that aren’t that important to you.
Journalling is such an incredibly healing process.
I encourage all of my clients to journal throughout their sessions.
“I’m sick of not seeing bodies like mine!”
This is why media diversity is so important.
Letting go of the addiction to your wound.
This one spoke to me, particularly as someone who is in the business of discussing body image daily. It’s important for me to be able to discuss my past and where I come from without feeling like those struggles define me! It’s something that I work on consistently to make sure that I’m living in the present, and not caught up constantly thinking about the past.
“I can’t remember a time when my internal dialogue wasn’t berating and cruel. I’ve always had a punishing attitude toward myself, always felt like I wasn’t good enough. In the days following my suicide attempt, I felt especially worthless. I was overcome by the plague of internal terrors that tell me: No one loves you, Jenny. You’re pathetic. You’re a drain on others and they’re better off without you. You don’t deserve to live.”
What I mean when I say I have anxiety.
If you know someone who suffers from anxiety, read this. It’s different for everyone (and even in one person, the symptoms can vary widely based on the context of the anxiety).
What would you say to your 12 year old self?
I bet that 12-year-old you could use a hug.
25 famous women on dealing with anxiety and depression.
If you struggle with either/both, you’re not alone.
100 things to be thankful for.
This list is great – and yes, a lot of these things depend on the privilege afforded to us but one of the greatest ways to understand your privilege is to start with gratitude!
Wise words on wishful thinking.
“Wishful thinking is tangled up with craving. We want what we want. So we ignore the evidence that we’re very likely not going to get what we want out of a situation. Craving… wishing. Craving… denial. Craving… tolerating. It’s a wishous cycle.”
Are you living in the present?
Here are a few easy tips on mindfulness.
“It is a contradiction to work for social justice and perpetuate fatphobia at the same time. This should be obvious, and yet many people with strong commitments to social justice often use rhetoric that entrenches the oppression of fat people.”